Tuesday, June 14, 2011

All the little Viruses I have defeated.

As I mentioned previously I'm in the process of applying for college. I'm a vary non traditional student in that I've waited 8 years to go. This is because I had a job when I graduated Highschool, one that turned into a full time job before the store closed. Then within 6 months had another part time job in which I was making as much as I had in the full time job previously. I saw no reason to bother with school. The second job was "a pretty sweet deal", and since its been around for ages, was unlikely to go away. It was Union and all that jazz, so it was pretty well set. That changed. My position has been made redundant and I'm going to be out on my ass. Now it seems like a bad idea to have skipped school 8 years ago.. but how was I to know.

So, I've gone and filled in all the paperwork, paid the fees for processing. All was going swimmingly until they said "we need your immunization paperwork". "Isn't it on my school transcripts? " "No" they said. "Ok I'll go get copies", and so off I set to drive madly around town looking for copies of my vaccination records. The first stop I went to was the county school board. Surely, since I had to have them to get into school, They would have them on file. No such luck. So it's off to the county board of health. Same answer. Then I looked in the phone book and found out the pediatrician who had administered them was still practicing. I went to her office. Only to find out that in 2003, she had had an office fire and lost all her records.


So now I'm faced with the chilling possibility that I may have to have some 30 shots in a matter of days in order to finish my application process. These are shots that, even at the low rate of 13.57$ each from the county health center.. add up really quickly and I can ill afford. To top that off, I hate shots. The Health center explained to me that I could get a blood test, and they could do a check on what I'm toting around with me. My defeated enemies, the viruses Measles, Mumps, Ruebella, Varicilla, Tetanus, Diptheria, Hepatitus A and B, and a few of their other buddies.. will apparently show up on a blood test.

The idea of that is even more terrifying than the injections. Since it includes ... blood.

You see. Like the character of Doc Martin, played by martin clunes I'm Haemophobic.

So I'm stuck now between two sharp pointy objects, one wanting to inject me, and one wanting to take out of me.

It reminds me of the old British navy joke, about how to chose which biscuit to eat. You tap the biscuits upon the table, and then compare the relative sizes of the weevils which tumble from their homes.. and then choose the lesser of the two weevils.

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